I’m not sure that, ever in my whole life, have I experienced something more beautiful. The crisp wind blowing so gently through the trees. Magnificent trees. Trees that could tell us decades of stories. Stories we could never begin to imagine. Stories not of death, but of life. Of the life that surrounds them. The life of those that left us behind.
As the sun peaks through the clouds, and shines just for a second on the grounds below the trees, I imagine a child chasing that flurry of red and orange leaves across the grass. It’s so quiet. The only sounds you can hear is that of the wind in the trees and the faint chirps of a bird hiding somewhere. I watch as family and friends come and go. Not one paying any attention to the other. It’s poinsettia season. A sea of red patches covers the green grass, still damp from the morning’s rain. It’s quite festive actually. I imagine the trees must love this time of year.
I sit there for what seems like hours. Nothing has ever felt so peaceful. So safe. I sit there wishing I wasn’t alone. Wishing I was sharing this beautiful moment with someone. Wishing I didn’t miss her so, so very much. Wishing that I didn’t miss her more every year, every day.
So often, I find myself wondering if she is proud of me. If she thinks I am beautiful. If she can hear me when I talk to her. I wonder if she knows how much I miss her. Just once, I wish I could hear her say she is proud of me. That she thinks I am beautiful. That she is with me. Just once.
As I lay, watching the clouds pass over, noticing the sky get darker, the wind whispers in my ear, “Never settle.” I don’t understand what that means to me today. But I am confident that the day those words are supposed to be clear to me, I will know she was here. She was here the whole time. I wasn’t alone. She was sitting with me, listening to my cries, drying my tears, and encouraging my dreams.
It was in that very moment that tiny drops of rain started to fall from the sky. And I sat there. Just sat there. Coincidence? Maybe. But I’d like to believe it was just her confirming she was watching over me.
We may not ever understand the world we live in. Or ever get life’s questions answered. But we must believe that there is a reason for everything. And have hope that one day we will understand. And we will get our answers.
Until then, the trees will always be there to listen.
As the sun peaks through the clouds, and shines just for a second on the grounds below the trees, I imagine a child chasing that flurry of red and orange leaves across the grass. It’s so quiet. The only sounds you can hear is that of the wind in the trees and the faint chirps of a bird hiding somewhere. I watch as family and friends come and go. Not one paying any attention to the other. It’s poinsettia season. A sea of red patches covers the green grass, still damp from the morning’s rain. It’s quite festive actually. I imagine the trees must love this time of year.
I sit there for what seems like hours. Nothing has ever felt so peaceful. So safe. I sit there wishing I wasn’t alone. Wishing I was sharing this beautiful moment with someone. Wishing I didn’t miss her so, so very much. Wishing that I didn’t miss her more every year, every day.
So often, I find myself wondering if she is proud of me. If she thinks I am beautiful. If she can hear me when I talk to her. I wonder if she knows how much I miss her. Just once, I wish I could hear her say she is proud of me. That she thinks I am beautiful. That she is with me. Just once.
As I lay, watching the clouds pass over, noticing the sky get darker, the wind whispers in my ear, “Never settle.” I don’t understand what that means to me today. But I am confident that the day those words are supposed to be clear to me, I will know she was here. She was here the whole time. I wasn’t alone. She was sitting with me, listening to my cries, drying my tears, and encouraging my dreams.
It was in that very moment that tiny drops of rain started to fall from the sky. And I sat there. Just sat there. Coincidence? Maybe. But I’d like to believe it was just her confirming she was watching over me.
We may not ever understand the world we live in. Or ever get life’s questions answered. But we must believe that there is a reason for everything. And have hope that one day we will understand. And we will get our answers.
Until then, the trees will always be there to listen.
